😂 Daily HaHa's February 18, 2025

Joke of the Day

I was robbed by 6 dwarves today…not happy.

Dad Jokes

😉  Just got a new job as a church bell ringer. It's my first day so they're just showing me the ropes.

😉 eBay is useless. I tried to search for lighters, and all they had was 13,771 matches!

One Liners

😆  Just been on the weightwatchers website and it asked me if I accept cookies…is that a trick question?

😆 Always wanted to marry Mrs. Right…just didn’t know her first name was going to be “Always”.

Short Jokes

🤣  Jake Bernstein, a much loved and revered young man was taken prematurely, and, as he was lowered into the ground his 3 best friends were stood there, and Jack the English guy says, "Jake was a a great guy who did so much for us all in his short life and I'm going to give him £100 to take with him", and Jack takes out 5 crisp £20 notes and throws them on top of the coffin. Paddy, his Irish mate agrees with him and says "I'm going to match that" and takes out 10 crisp 10 pound notes and throws them in also. Manny their Jewish pal shakes his head and says, "I can't believe you two cheapskates after all Jake did for us...I'm going to give him £1200 to take with him to his maker", and writes out a cheque for £1400, and puts it on the coffin while taking the 200 pounds cash out and putting it in his pocket.

🤣 So, Young Eddie is walking around his local supermarket picking up a few items for his evening meal when he notices an old lady following him. He tries to ignore her but every direction he goes she follows. Eventually he heads to the checkout, but the old lady manages to get in front of him and turns to speak to him. “I beg your pardon,” says the old lady, “I am very sorry if I have alarmed you by following you around, but you look just like my son who passed away recently.” Eddie replies, “I am very sorry to hear that, it that must be very disconcerting for you. “Is there anything I can do to help you?” The old lady takes his hand and says, “Well, there is one small thing that would cheer me up a bit,” She continues, “It sounds a wee bit silly but, as I’m leaving, will you call out ‘Goodbye mother’ to me?” “Of course,” says Eddie and as the old woman leaves the store, she smiles at him and waves. Eddie waves back and calls out, “Goodbye mother!” The old lady quickly leaves and the girl on the till then checks-out his items and says, “That will be £135.” Eddie is shocked and says, “That can't be right. “How can my bill be £135?” he asks, “I’ve only bought a few things!” The checkout girl replies, “Well yes but Your mother said that you would be paying for her shopping as well!”

Meme

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A merry heart does good, like medicine. Proverbs 17:22