Joke of the Day!

It's hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.

Dad Jokes

😉 My girlfriend runs a battery kiosk at the local park. She sells C cells by the seesaw.

😉 I joined a Carpenter’s Class the other day, but we haven’t made anything yet. We’ve only just begun.

One Liners

😆 I was lonely until I glued a coffee cup on top of my car. Now everyone waves at me.

😆 Wanna know the last thing my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket? "Wonder how far I can kick this bucket".

Long Joke

🤣 Mike was sitting on the edge of the bed, watching his wife Jill, who was looking at herself in the mirror. Since Jill’s birthday was not too far off, Mike asked her what she’d like to have for her birthday. “I’d like to be eight again,” Jill replied, still looking in the mirror. On the morning of Jill’s Birthday, Mike got up early and made her a nice big bowl of Coco Pops. After breakfast, Mike took Jill to the Adventure World theme park. What a day they had. Mike put Jill on every thrilling ride in the park. First, it was the Death Slide, then the Wall of Fear, then the Log Flume and finally the Screaming Roller Coaster. And after the rides, they went to see the Dolphin Show. Five hours later they staggered out of the theme park, exhausted. Jill’s head was reeling and her stomach felt upside down. However, Mike wasn’t finished. He then took Jill to McDonald’s where he ordered her a Happy Meal with extra fries and a chocolate shake. Then it was off to see a Disney movie, with popcorn, soda pop, and her favorite candy. Mike hoped Jill would see it all as a fabulous adventure and a bit like being eight again. Finally, they staggered home and collapsed into bed, tired and weary. At this point, Mike leaned over to Jill with a big smile on his face and asked lovingly, “Well dear, what was it like being eight again?” Her eyes opened slowly, one at a time, and her expression changed suddenly. “I was referring to my dress size, you idiot,” Jill responded sarcastically.

Moral of the Story: Even if a man’s listening, he’ll still get it wrong.

Meme

Incontinental Airlines…

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A merry heart does good, like medicine. Proverbs 17:22