😂 Daily HaHa's November 3, 2024

Joke of the Day!

I used to work in a grocery store bagging people’s groceries. I really wanted to work the juice-making machine in the deli, but when I applied they turned me down because baggers can’t be juicers.

Kids/Dad Jokes

😉 The man who invented Velcro has died. RIP.

😉 I named my two dogs Rolex and Timex. They’re my watch dogs.

😉 I asked my wife when her birthday was. She said March 1st. So I walked around the room and asked again.

Short Jokes

😂 I got a new pair of gloves today, but they’re both ‘lefts,’ which on the one hand is great, but on the other, it’s just not right.

😂 A dimwit explains to another friend: "I failed the driving test. I entered the round-about and the sign said "30" so I drove 30 times around." And the other one says: "You probably counted wrong."

😂 A homeless man saw a banker leaving his office building. "How about a buck for a cup of coffee?" The banker said, "Here's five bucks, just don't bug me again." The next day, as the same banker was leaving the same office, the same homeless guy punched him in the nose. "Oowww!" yelled the banker, "is that how you thank me for giving you five dollars yesterday?" The homeless man snarled back, "Those five cups of coffee kept me awake all night!"

Long Joke

🤣 A man is driving down the road and his car breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the door, knocks, and says, "My car broke down, do you think I could stay the night?" The monks graciously brings him inside, feeds him dinner, even fixes his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound; a sound unlike anything he's ever heard before. He doesn't sleep that night and tosses and turns trying to figure out what could possibly be making such a strange weird sound. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, "We can't tell you, you're not a monk." Distraught, the man is forced to leave. Years later, and almost going crazy for never being able to forget that sound, the man goes back to the monastery and begs for the answer again. The monks reply, "We can't tell you, you're not a monk." The man says, "If the only way I can find out what is making that beautiful sound is to become a monk, then please, make me a monk." The monks reply, "Ok, but you must travel the earth, and come back and tell us how many blades of grass there are in the world, and the exact number of grains of sand. When you find these answers, you will have become a monk." The man sets about his task, and after years of searching he returns as a gray-haired old man and knocks on the door of the monastery. A monk answers, and he is taken before a gathering of all the monks. "In my quest to find what makes that strange sound, I traveled the earth and have found what you asked for and the answer is…by design, the world is in a state of perpetual change, only God knows what you asked. All a man can know is himself, and only then if he is honest and reflective and willing to strip away self deception." The monks reply, "Congratulations. You have become a monk. We shall now show you the way to the mystery of the sacred sound." The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, "The sound is beyond that door." The monks gives him the key, and he opens the door. Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man is given the key to the stone door and he opens it, only to find a door made of ruby. And so it went that he needed keys to more doors made of emerald, pearl and diamond. Finally, he comes to a door made of solid gold. The sound has become very clear and definite. The monks say, "This is the last key to the last door." The man is apprehensive to no end. His life's wish is behind that door! With trembling hands, he unlocks the door, turns the knob, and slowly pushes the door open. Falling to his knees, he is utterly amazed to discover the source of that haunting and seductive sound, but, of course, I can't tell you what it is because you're not a monk.

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A merry heart does good, like medicine. Proverbs 17:22