😂 Daily HaHa's July 1, 2024

My dad always told me, “Don't be too quick to find faults.” Great man, terrible geologist.

👉️ What do you call an elf who runs off and stops working for Santa? A rebel without a Claus.

👉️ Local janitors have gone out on strike. They are demanding sweeping reforms.

👉️ A teacher asks the class, "Can you use a sentence with the word 'fascinate'..?" One of the pupils replies, "I have a shirt with ten buttons but I can only fascinate".

👉️ Two inmates were chatting in the prison food line. One told the other, "When I was governor, the food here was better!"

👉️ The real estate agent says, "I have a good, cheap apartment for you. "The man replies, "By the week or by the month?" The agent answers, "By the garbage dump."

👉️ I made some jerk chicken and rice today. He didn’t even say thank you.

👉️ "If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into Heaven?" I asked the children in my Sunday school class. "NO!" the children all answered. "If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into Heaven?" Again, the answer was, "NO!" "Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children, and loved my wife, would that get me into Heaven?" Again, they all answered, "NO!" "Well," I continued, "then how can I get into Heaven?" A five-year-old boy shouted out, "YOU GOTTA BE DEAD!"